There is a short path to “has been”.

There is a short path to “has been”, laced with regret, guilt and feeling of failure.

Such feelings intensify by holding on to those “used to be” dreams and remembering how great it was to be a “be”. But how can you not remember the times when you were on top of the world, heard the crowds cheering, basked by the looks of admiration? Can you ever?

There is really no elapsed time that takes one from “used to be” to “has been” … within reason of course. It is more of a state of mind and realistic longing to return to the gleaming place once held and labored so hard to reach. To be a "be", one mastered the art of “not giving up”, but for a number of reasons, has done just that.

Being on the brink of “has been” is deeply painful ….. desperately gripping the edge as not to fall and complete the journey down.

This is a time to make a choice. You can do one of four things.

First….”Languish in the Past”. As Webster defines “Languish …. 1. a.) To be or become feeble, weak, or enervated (oh my God … another word to look up!), b.) to be in or live in a state of depression or decreasing vitality, 2. a.) To become dispirited. b.) To suffer neglect 3.) to assume an expression of grief or emotion appealing for sympathy. This is not the best option for obvious reasons. The image of a car spinning it’s wheels in the mud ….. messy and going no where. The other image is that cauliflowered ear prizefighter leathered and punch drunk, earning his next drink by reliving his moments of glory in the ring. What comes of this but pity, shame and tired tales that eventually no one wants to hear. The free drinks stop coming.

Second is to “Savor the Past” and look at it fondly. You recognize what it is and all it was. You know in your heart of hearts that you did good, achieved a great deal and will not be going back in mind, body and spirit. When you are reminded of your time as a “be” by some “wanna be”, you will have that knowing smile and say to yourself … “yup, I was there once.” You are at peace.

Third is to “Get back on the Horse”. Seemingly an easy choice but in reality requires more then sporting a cowboy hat and strapping on chaps. Speaking from experience (not by putting on chaps, mind you) but putting on my karate gi after it has been hibernating in a gear bag deep inside my closet for five years. I almost forgot how to wrap it on and tie my belt in a respectable knot. The gi was minor compared to bowing in to the dojo for the first time after so many years. Just like standing on the edge of an open door on a plane, skydiving for the first time.

Fourth is to “Find Another” …… mountain to climb, a language to learn, a second career, a new business, etc.. In other words, recognizing that you don’t want to become that same “be” again but willing to take a new leap as a different “wanna be”. You understand you don’t want to go back but you want to move in a different, exciting direction. The cycle begins!! State of "Be"ing Cycle Diagram

Enervate: 1.) To lessen the vitality or strength of, 2.) to reduce the moral and mental vigor.